6/18/09

Bad parent day

Good grief! I'm having a bad parent day. I've been doing so good lately, but things have just been stacking up. I know my kid is no different than most everyone else's anymore. She came to us with a lot of issues, but 22 months of therapy for us all and a new style of parenting for Rob and I has helped us work through so many of them. And from what I hear from the parent's I talk to, Sydney is better than most at following the rules. But lately, the sense of entitlement to only have fun, and half doing chores to create time for that fun, has been more than I can stand. For the first time in a long time, I raised my voice instead of just assigning an extra chore right off the bat, when she frustrated me. I ended up leaving breakfast on the stove and closing myself up in the bedroom for about 20 minutes and things got a little better.



And, it didn't help that I picked up my new glasses yesterday and what he recommended and I agreed to was not how he described it and I couldn't see a thing that was more than 8 feet away. They were great for close up work, like quilting and reading, but I couldn't see the TV and when I tried to drive to work this morning, I couldn't read the streetsigns, or even the billboards without putting my chin on my chest. That's not going to do me any good, so I took them back this morning and told them I'd need the lenses replaced. They were good sports about it, and I think they expected it because we had this whole discussion yesterday about how the doctor knew I couldn't see at a distance without glasses and I was sure he wouldn't prescribe glasses that weren't going to allow me to see to drive (he was out of the office). So I took them to test and try to get used to, but it didn't take long to realize that I could only see distance through about the top 1/8 inch of lense. RATS! Two to three more weeks of headaches before the new ones get here. But a headache can't keep this quilter from quilting, and I have the font on my computer at work set to larger print.



Okay, so now that is over, how about some quilting. I finished the $5 block last night. That one is due today...nothing like a deadline. Disappointed in the quilt as a whole this year, too. I realized there were going to be issues when she assigned a block that had an orange that clashes with all the pinks she already used. I'll probably take the orange block apart soon and replace the fabrics with a pink I already have. No need to make another ugly quilt, just for the practice.

And, I read all about that Karen Stone quilt I'm going to make with my mentor. You Go, Em! for being able to pick the designer just from a photo. The colors are gold/orange/brown and gray/black/purple. She said the fabrics were going to make a very fall colored quilt...not that mine will be done by fall. I haven't seen them, but I do know her stash and it should be phenomenal. We will be getting together as soon as my foundations get here to get started.

And, because I was in such a mood this morning, I sneaked into the sewing room to add border strips to a cmas block. The sound of the needle going up and down is soooo relaxing. I'm sure Sydney knew it would calm me, because she gave me a few minutes in there alone and then came in to chat and ask questions. Of course, that was my chance to apologize for being so stressed and raising my voice. I guess all's well that ends well.

Take care and we'll see you on the homepage. Lane

7 comments:

Vesuviusmama said...

I applaud you for your efforts to not raise your voice. I try, boy do I try, but I fail regularly. Luckily, my kids and I hug and tell each other that we love each other many times a day, so I think they know I am all bark and no bite. Or perhaps they are confused little souls with a mother who is scarring them for life. Yikes! I need to do better. I'm glad you were able to sew a bit to calm down. But I'm curious, what happened to the breakfast on the stove? Did you turn it off first, at least?

quiltfool said...

Hey, Erin. Breakfast was all made and I just left it there. She fixed our plates and put mine in the micro to wait till I got back and when I did, she was sitting at table eating. I joined her and we were very quiet. I wouldn't worry about scaring them. You've had them all their lives to show them who you are and how you express yourself and that you love them, even when you're angry. Sydney didn't have that luxury. For her, abandonment started with shouting, so I've pretty much had to give it up. Take care. Lane

CapLady-Molly said...

I remember those days, it is very hard to not raise your voice. Jay used to tell me, "If you want to raise your voice, then sing." Of course when I did everyone left the house ! May your days get better my friend.

Piwacket said...

Thank you for visiting my blog and becoming a follower. This is my first visit to yours and I'm impressed! I hope to stop by frequently. Ironically, my Momcat's screen name on a previous board was Quiltnfool. Great minds and all that, eh?

Becky said...

Yeah, you'll have those days with kids. Sounds like things worked out ok. I found it was helpful when I felt I had messed up that I apologize.....and you did that. It makes for an honest relationship, don't you think? Hope you have a better day tomorrow.

MaryMM said...

Oh yes, I remember to well raising my voice with our son. It was seldom but when I did it was like crushing his spirit. Even today he is atune to my moods. One thing I know for sure is she knows you love her and would not hurt her for any reason. Take care and have a wonderful Father's Day!! MaryMM

Kim said...

Parenting is the toughest job you'll ever love.
I'm a new grandparent this year and now I have to start a new relationship all over again with a new child. Just remember to show and demand respect, love and kindness. After a blow up try to explain why you felt the way you did at the time, have a real heart to heart and encourage the child to do the same. Honestly, I have a 33 year old son and a 28 year daughter and even through the rocky times they always knew I would listen and give them my unconditonal love.....even when I didn't agree.
I'm new to blogging too and came through to your site from Erin's....your first quilt you posted is lovely, great colors. How did you quilt it?

Happy Father's Day, just do your best with the kids :0).
Happy Sewing, its good therapy huh?

Kim