Where ev'ry body knows your name....

Remember the Cheers theme song? 

"Sometimes you wanna go
Where ev'ry body knows your name..."

Last week, I wrote a post about feeling overwhelmed with the whole wedding thing.

That kind of got resolved.  Turned out, it was mostly about being married, but not being finished getting married. 

Last Saturday took care of that.  We are finished getting married.  And, that has made it easier to talk about.  Things are settled and no longer up in the air.

So, I started telling people.  Rob and I told the therapist... who actually holds a lot of the responsibility for me getting out there and doing this in such a momentous way.  Then, I told some friends that I hadn't talked to.  And, finally, I started telling people at work. 

It's been so nice to feel so appreciated.  And, so understood. 

One of my co-workers thought to word it best.  I wish I could quote her, but this is as close as I could get: 

Rob and I are celebrating the legalization of same gender marriage by getting married.  But, we celebrated our actual union years ago, when we got together and made a commitment to stay together and to honor one another.  The legalization is like adding frosting to a cake we've been eating for 15 years. 

There have been hugs and congratulations and a few cards, and it's all been very understated and quiet, just like we like it to be.  We know that our besteys, far and near, are celebrating with us.  And, we are celebrating with you.  Because same gender marriage is a win for us all. 

And, who doesn't want a little frosting on a 15 year old cake, right?

So, thank you all so much for your well wishes.  I cried each time I got an email or a card.  I was so moved by the response.  And, I'm glad I was able to express our story in ways that people enjoyed and were moved by. 

Everybody have a great Friday!!!  Lane


Kathleen said...

beautiful post..

Andra Gayle said...

Lane, My husband and I are celebrating 20 years of marriage this month. I think it is lovely that you and Rob are able to celebrate your marriage with a ceremony that honors your 15 years together. However, You have obviously and joyfully been married for 15 years. Congratulations on achieving that great milestone. Here's to many more decades of joy for you and Rob.
Think of how many new adventures you are going to have in the next 15 years. For my husband and I, we are looking at High School graduations, putting kids through college, weddings, grandkids- wow, I can't even imagine what it will be like, except that I know it is going to be a big change with a lot of joy. I am sure it will be for you too!

lw said...

I'm so happy for you! Telling one and all makes it feel real, and your family deserves real happiness.

Anonymous said...

I 've been married for nearly 50 years and can honestly say we are happy to see you and all others who have finally been allowed to join the club, that you are very welcome in that club. Many years of happiness to you and Rob.

Anonymous said...

Like you and Rob, I wasn't big into rushing into marriage (you were kept from it by legal issues: we were circumspect about such a long-term commitment without living together and really knowing about everyday life together to make that decision). We have had had 33 years together (30 legally married in September). I thing that marriage for you two, just like we two, is like jumping over the broom. You already know that you are in the partnership for the long-term. A formal marriage is just like formally telling everyone that you are prepared to stick out the good times and the bad times together. Sydney is one lucky lassie.. She knows that her dads aren't going to run away when things get a wee bit ropey. Again, good wishes to you all. Long live (real) love!