12/13/12

OCD

I think one of the things that people have the hardest time understanding about me is my Obsessive Compulsive Disorder.  Okay, so my anger can be a bit weird and scary, too.  But, it’s my OCD that makes people look at me funny.
Maybe it’s because it doesn’t always show.  Most of the time, I walk around as happy as a clam.  But, when I get near the end of a project, it’s “Katie, bar the door”…can’t stop, won't stop, you’ll just make me mad if you try to get me to stop.  And, I end up resenting the reason I have to stop.  It’s usually pretty short lived and I get into the next event okay, but sometimes…
not so much.
Anyway, this has been on my mind today, as I’ve made myself late to work, trying to get this stupid pocket to work. 
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First, I put a plain pocket, with a dark binding all around, and I hated it.  It’s just a pocket to hold a recipe card, but I hated it.  The simplicity of it actually clashed with the ruffle at the bottom hem of the apron…at least in my mind.  And, I tried to make myself like that square (because it was finished), but I couldn’t.
This morning, I’ve gotten almost finished with the apron for my neighbor, but that pocket just stood out in all it’s horror.
So, I took it off and took it apart, because I have just a few scraps of fabric and needed that little piece, and I started over. 
And, that’s when the OCD kicked in.  I couldn’t walk away from it.  Oh, I did walk away from it, but I kept coming back and working on it more.  Just a bit more.  Just a tiny bit more.  One step, go workout.  Two step, take a shower.  Three step, make breakfast.  Four step, write this blog post. 
But, as you can see, I did get it made and it is ready to be attached…and it is fabulous.
So, now I can actually go to the office and focus on what’s happening there, and not obsess about this stupid pocket.
The apron overall?  All I can say is that it looks terrible on me.  I need a smaller person to try it on.  Someone that looks better in ruffles.
Oh, and while I’m talking about aprons, Remember this one?
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Barb found that fabric, at Fabric.com.  I’ve ordered a yard and a half.  It should be here in a few days.  And, then, I’ll start working on a new apron for me.  Maybe I’ll even order enough of that fabric to make new kitchen curtains.  That would be ab-fab in my yellow kitchen!
Be well.  I’ve done all I need to do and can go to work now.
Lane

5 comments:

Becky said...

The apron is coming along VERY nicely! I'm so glad you found that fabric. It has a nice retro feel to it....and it would make delightful kitchen curtains!

Elizabeth said...

Yeah, I'm the same way. If it doesn't sit right in my head, I have to keep working on it until it comes out. I can't just leave it.

Nice job on the apron. Love that pretty yellow fabrics and the green accents it nicely.

xo -E

Unknown said...

I will work and work at something like that and then just have to walk away. I am in love with the new fabric!

Bianca said...

Love the apron! If I had a better figure (hourglass typ) I would wear one all the time. But I don't, so I won't.
Know exactly what you mean though about the OCD. Have bit of that myself. Sometimes I even get out of bed in the middle of the night, wanting to try something I just thought of and have to do it, or I just can't get back to sleep. This morning I did just that!! 5 am I woke up and finally had an idea on how to quilt that big ass quilt for my sisters friend.... The cats were not amused and didn't want to get out of bed yet. It was still dark!!! After an hour of drawing and having a try, I saw it worked and I could go back to bed.
I guess its a perfectionist-thing, don't you think?? Sounds better than OCD....

Anonymous said...

You should have seen my husband's face when I ripped out a bunch of crochet because it wasn't right. But I could not live with it. I think of it as perfectionism. It is a good thing, mostly, isn't it?