OMG, what have I done?

Hi, my name is Lane.  This is my daughter Sydney.

She’s a freshman.  My personal goal for basketball this year is to do things I’ve never done.  My favorite basketball memory is watching Sydney walk out to the car in her practice uniform and cowboy boots.  She blamed this crime against fashion on Rob, who told her not to wear her new, expensive basketball shoes outside the gym.

Last night was the mandatory parent meeting for girls basketball and that’s the kind of introduction each of the girls had to give about themselves.  If they didn’t want to share a goal or memory, the could share an appropriate quote.  Some did and the quotes were very appropriate. 

I don’t remember much of what Sydney said.  She introduced herself and pointed us out and said “and those are my two Daddies back there.”  and a Mom yelled “where”.  and Sydney pointed again and said “back there” and Rob and I waved.  And, I don’t remember much of what happened after that.

Now, before you get all misty eyed, yes that was a wonderful thing for her to do and I am so proud of her for doing it.  But, I’m from an old school and while I was busting my buttons with pride, not just that she pointed us out, but that she did it so proudly, I was also trying to crawl between two floor tiles because I guess it is always going to be uncomfortable to be “outed” in a crowd of strangers. 

Ya wanna know sumpin?  I’ll live with that, if the next generation can be prouder than my generation was.  That’s progress.

Anyway, after a while, it got to be time for parents to sign up to volunteer.  Before I left the table, I gave Sydney one of my very hard looks and when she said “what?” I replied, I’m just not sure you know what you’re getting yourself into.

So, what did I sign up for, you ask?  Not food, that’s for sure.  They were looking for people to volunteer to feed 45 people a main course, a side and a drink.  And, Coach did not describe that as sandwiches and chips.

I volunteered to…

Keep the score sheet, keep the clock, and work the gate.  All on different nights.  Each one on three different occasions. 

That is so much NOT like me.  I guess I got caught up in the fervor.  I don’t think Rob approved, and that’s all right.  He’s the one that’s going to have to hear me moan and gripe about “what did I do?  How did I let myself sign up for this?  I can’t do this.  I’m going to have to talk to people.  What have I done?”

But, you know what?  I signed up for the things that interested me the most out of what was presented.   And, right now, I’m feeling VERY comfortable with what I have volunteered to do. 

Of course, I will be reading up on the game of basketball, because, like I told the coach before I signed up, I’ll volunteer, but I’m going to need training.  I don’t have any idea how to do these things.  And, coach said it didn’t matter.

There were only about 10 of us, signing up for about 60 volunteer opportunities.  So, I don’t feel bad about signing up to work at 9 home games.  Lots of folks didn’t volunteer for anything. 

Another thing that surprised me, and went right along with Sydney not being ashamed that she had two dads, was the fact that so many of these girls were there with a guardian.  Generally a relative.  Half the girls there are being raised by a grandparent or an older sibling.  Unconventional families are all the rage now, I guess, so we’re going to fit right in. 

Keep me in your thoughts.  I don’t always have the confidence I had last night.  I will second guess myself.  I will berate myself.  But, there’s something else about myself.  Even though I’ll be uncomfortable, I’ll be there for every single one of those volunteer opportunities…early.  And, like my Dad taught me, I’ll stay until they don’t need me anymore.

That’s me, too.

Be well and have a great Thursday.  I’m trying to take tomorrow off to do some things that I am not finding time in my regular life for.  Unfortunately, that isn’t just quilting.

And, my Mom told me to tell you all thanks for the good thoughts and prayers during her surgery last week.  She’s doing well and walking on her new knee with little pain. 



JoAnne said...

I think you will do fine with the tasks you volunteered for. Heavens, I would much rather run the clock than cook for 45! In my days as a hockey mom (my daughter was the first girl to varsity letter in hockey at her high school!) I ran the scoreboard and did stats sometimes. (Most of the time I did hand-applique. I have a whole album quilt that I mostly made that season at games.) It will be fun!

Becky said...

Those would have been my choices as well. I don't do food.
Glad to hear your mom is doing well.

Coloradolady said...

I was that same person when it came to volunteering when my kids were in school...most of the time running what ever event was next....I have done all the above things you talked about and by far, you made the right choice. Not so hard at all, that you will see, and good volunteer hours and get to enjoy the sport too!! I too was always the last to leave and lots of times, dragging my husband along with me...who am I kidding..all the time he was dragging!!! Have a great day! I am off to day and MUST get something done!

Laura said...

I think you did the right thing by volunteering. It's not about you right now, it's about your daughter, and you want to support her in her activities. You will get to know the other girls by volunteering too, and that's a good thing.

PattiLynn said...

I think you chose wisely...better than cooking for 45, for sure!
Congrats on being willing to try new things, for the cause. Looks like you're still Growing...and that's wonderful!
Sydney's coming along so good, you and Rob are seeing the results of all the love you've poured into her (and hard work). So proud for you!

Maureen said...

I personally would rather cook for 45! However, I learned to do all those things (and I was a rally wimpy little girl, so none of them came naturally) and I don't regret a minute of it now. Back then, though ... it got pretty exhausting and took a lot of "coordination" to get through it, not to mention the agonies of "am I doing this right?". Hurray for volunteers, because that's how our kids get those valuable experiences. And hurray for Sydney and her generation. The world is going to be in good hands!

Anonymous said...

Good for you!! And trust Sydney's instincts. She probably knows her two dads will be accepted more than you think. And it shows she's proud of you.

Kath said...

This made me a bit teary, well done Sydney. Next time she is having a teenage moment, remember how much she loves you and is proud of you both.
Well done you Lane, for taking the step to volunteer. What a great family you are.

Megan said...

Lane - I'm like you: don't find it comfortable to meet new people. However, I admire your willingness to 'feel the fear and do it anyway'. The good thing about the roles that you've chosen to volunteer for is that they are roles and you have certain tasks that you'll be responsible for and while you're doing them, you'll be meeting people as a 'side effect' so to speak. I find this much much easier than just starting casual conversation with the person standing next to me in a crowd. Have fun!

Sydney, Australia

lw said...

They're young for such a short time, volunteering for her team is a really good idea. More happy memories for her-- your support is worth everything.

Kate said...

What a perfectly lovely heartwarming post. You are raising a lovely young woman who will appreciate people and complex issues. Good job!

qltmom9 said...

Feeding 45 even simple foods would be costly!!! Ouch! So cool that your girl is proud of two daddies. Hey for all the strangers know you could be her step-daddy and the other, her bio-daddy. Just be PROUD of her and don't care what they think (easy to SAY, eh?). Obviously, you have done well.
GLAD your mama doing well.~


Cynthia L. said...

Ok Lane, in my book, you are crazy! I would have gone for feeding 45 people! I can't count much higher than 5 without a calculator, so any of the tasks you signed up for would be bad for me! I could bake up a storm and mail it all to you!

I am proud of Sydney and proud of you and Rob. I am always amazed at the things my daughter does and says also. When she was a freshman in college she signed up for PGLAG and told everyone she had two moms! Gotta love those kids!

Carla said...

Good for you for volunteering. You're right about the number of parents present verses the number that volunteer.
One warning grow thick skin. People tend to yell at the clock person because they didn't stop it or didn't start it whatever.
And Good for Sydney but did you really expect less from this daughter of yours. You've raised her right so far. She's proud of y'all.
Have fun and good luck. The more you're involved the more you'll get out all the sporting events she'll drag you to. ;o)
I was a swimming and waterpolo mom for 4 years of HS and 4 in college.